Boy, ain't that the truth? I got an invitation to a Christian singles weekend in the mail today. Talk about the unexpected! Hey, it certainly did give me some amusement for the afternoon! But, that's life . . . always something different, weird, strange, out-of-the-ordinary knocking at the old door when you least expect it. But that's why you have kids - that element of total surprise.

My son Tom brought home a lovely girl for the holidays. A lovely, rich girl. Have I ever felt so totally poverty stricken in my life? No, I don't think so. You see, I was pretty happy with the fact that I had bought a new shower curtain about a month ago and suddenly I was talking to someone whose family had owned a weekend house in the country. (How do I know? The knotty pine in my kitchen reminded her of it.) And here I was thinking I was living high on the hog! My son Pat, inventive little genius that he is (I don't know why he continues to say he's adopted), gave me a Christmas gift that was awesome and didn't cost him a cent. He offered to let me cut his hair about four inches. This is where the genius part comes in - when I realized that at the length that he wanted it, it would be falling in his face all the time, I told him that maybe he better leave it long. He is a brilliant child!

Of course, that couldn't beat the Christmas surprise that Andy and Mike gave me. I'll give you a hint. They didn't bring any nice girls home to meet their mother. Nope, they stayed right where they were and visited via Verizon. Hmmm. I hope that I don't create the illusion that I was pleased in any way with this. Don't worry, I took lots of Kodak moment pictures so that they can feel suitably guilty and never pull that stunt again.

I will say that some elements of the holidays did remain the same. My son's friends were here in all their glory. Sean's dreadlocks were fashionable (OK, I'm being generous) as always and Lindsey didn't have any new piercings that I noticed. I do love the kids and look forward to seeing them every year. Was I ever that young?

The most impressive gift had to be my son's lava lamp - you remember them, chicken fat that globs around in a sea of colored water. My husband got out his old one and we had dueling lava lamps that simply engrossed every one. Ah, simple pleasures for simple minds . . .

But enough of the holidays. A new year is beginning. Lots to look forward to . . . and I'll be back at work by the time that you read this, buried under a pile of paperwork that should just about last me until next Christmas.