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It is hard to explain how I became a red light runner. I'm pretty sure that it started when I decided to go back to school. Maybe it was when I got my first real job. I don't know. All I can really attribute this lethal habit to is the feeling of rushing from one point to another. Then I began running red lights simply out of habit. I didn't want to have to stop my car while I was traveling. I hated the thought of wearing down my brakes. It had become an obsession. This had to stop!

There is a feeling of satisfaction that comes with running red lights. Everyone is left in the dust behind you. You haven't wasted time en route to your destination. You may actually get there on time. Then there is the added enjoyment of knowing that you beat the light. (Well, not really when you stop to think about it.)

My eyes were opened one day when I was waiting behind someone who had been stopped at the intersection between McKinley Avenue and North Street. As I waited, the woman in the car was distracted by her baby who was fussing in a car seat behind her.

She was having a pretty tough time trying to quiet the little one, and was almost completely turned backward in her seat, in an effort to consol her child. While she was turned around, the light turned green. Since I was able to identify with this poor woman, I waited patiently for her to calm the baby. A little more than ten seconds passed, when a car traveling on the street that now had the red light sped straight through the intersection. I saw what was happening, and was terrified knowing that there was nothing I could do to change the situation. The woman finally returned to the wheel and quietly drove through the green light without ever knowing that her crying baby had saved both their lives.

I could not help but see myself as the driver of the car that would have killed a beautiful mother and child. What immeasurable pain and suffering and grief accidents cause. Do I want to be responsible for causing such agony to others? Is it more important to drive within the law than to get to your destination a minute early?

Another time I was driving on the parkway. This time I did not feel so compelled to race to my destination. I had plenty of time, and was enjoying the drive, as much as anyone can during rush hour. This eighteen-wheel flat bed went roaring past me as I stopped at the light by African Road. It was startling to have that noise and weight flying by me, because I expected the truck to stop. My light turned green, and I drove ahead, catching green lights at the Town Square Mall, Rano Boulevard, and (oddly enough), at the Target intersection as well. Lo and behold, who should I see at the next light but the eighteen wheeler flat bed. Casually, as the light turned green, I changed lanes and slipped by the truck and went on my way toward the university.

How much time did the driver of that truck save by rushing under a red light? How much time will I save if I run another red light? It looks like I won't save any time. It looks like I may be placing innocent lives at risk because I don't want to leave the house five or ten minutes earlier. Are other drivers in some sort of competition with me? I doubt it.

I don't think there is a Red Light Runner's Anonymous in our town, but maybe there should be. This could be their motto:

Please grant me the serenity of knowing that others on the road are not competing with me;

Help me to change the time I leave so that I do not put my life or others at risk,

And help me to accept the red lights that I cannot change so that I may wait peacefully for the green.